Mentally the Sick

In the last few days, I got connected to Raj, I had some work related to IT filing, and could only think of him since I knew he holds an MBA degree in Finance. So, I contacted him to ask him if he could help. Although, he couldn’t because he said he is not into IT filing. That Whatsapp chat ended with an ‘okay, thank you’ from my end.

But on a Sunday morning, he texted me. OMG. This time around, he wanted some help from me, and the chat continued until yesterday night. Last night, I don’t know which drug I was on, that I shared a long text message with him, thanking him for influencing my life in the way he has influenced. And also shared the post of how I started watching Game of Thrones (GoT) because of him. I feel embarrassed for sharing that. I think now he considers me mentally the sick girl *sighs*.

Okay, that’s it. I don’t feel like writing any further. I am really really really embarrassed. I think I'm officially going to put an end to this fairytale and the dreamy world that I had created around Raj. I think I was just trying to rest my head on his shoulder in order to forget about the pain I was holding from within. ( A rebound, probably).

I've got to act my age. I wish I didn't have to put an end to my dream world like this. I loved being a self-proclaimed Alice in my own wonderland. He was my mad hatter in this mad world. Talking about him and with him kept me sane. Dreaming about him made me happy. But before I hurt myself, I think it's better to put an end to this mad hatter chapter of my life and keep him away from my wonderland. Because I kind of like my wonderland and don't want to come out of it like Alice did. So I'll remain here asking my mad hatter to take a leave. This wonderland is better than the fake people and the reality of the world.

I have his pet cats pictures with me, I'll put them here. :)











I remember how upset he was when the cat from the above picture had gone missing. Gundu, what a weird name, LOL! Sorry, for lol-ing, but Gundu? 👼





In our last conversation he said, he was a bad influence on people he met. I felt like yelling at him for thinking so. But I stopped myself because I don't think I had any right to yell at him. I wish I could yell at him and make him understand the importance of affirmative speech in life.

How can a person who has affection towards animals be bad or a bad influence? I think the ones who love animals are the best people. They understand the pain of these animals, who cannot express or talk like a human can. Oh, wait they express, they know to express and understand the language of love, in a better way than a human being does. So, how can Raj be a bad influence? I think not!

I just hope that he changes this belief at the earliest.

I wish I didn't have to let you leave my wonderland. But I think I have no choice. Bye Raj (my mad hatter).

Loads of love from dreamland and Alice to you.  ❤️